Coming up with a word for the year feels more organic and modern, but what about the tried and true New Year’s Resolution? I’m not opposed to it, but sometimes it feels like more of an expectation and leads to even more multi-tasking.
Then there’s the wisdom of SARK, my favorite inspirational writer. She recently introduced the concept of “allowing.” Nothing particularly new here, but it’s the idea of letting things be rather than making things happen. You can allow people to have different communication styles, different beliefs, and different ways of interacting with the world without trying to change them in any way. You can even allow people to drive differently than you without getting upset. This can be especially hard if someone just cut you off, but still worth the effort. After all, it keeps you more relaxed, which in the end, makes for a better day, and isn’t that what we’re all striving for?
So I decided to make my new year’s resolution one of allowing. It doesn’t mean I can’t still take action towards my goals, it just means that I stop trying to control the outcomes. Often when you stop trying to control, you find that things flow more smoothly. You can focus more on finding solutions rather than focusing on the problem. For instance, just today, my water was shut off for several hours unexpectedly right when I had a class to get to. My initial response was annoyance and even anger. But when I allowed for the fact that my complex had a job to do, then I could focus more on finding solutions. 1) Use the community bathroom to get ready. 2) Communicate my need for a telephone call rather than a flier in my mailbox when it’s short notice.
Whatever resolution you choose for this new year, consider “allowing” rather than trying to force the changes. You just might be amazed at the results!
“You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude
toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather
than allowing it to master you.” –Brian Tracy, author of Kiss That Frog!: 12 Great Ways to Turn Negatives into Positives in Your Life and Work